I have pretty much spent most of my time over the past week cramming and reading and writing. I am taking a WSET exam in July, and of course I did not casually study over the last two or three months as I had planned; instead I read the book and put off real studying, thinking for a while I could use the study guide. I was in denial. Because I learned once you get past the first five chapters (mostly wine production and grapegrowing), the study guide just doesn't cut it.
So last week I spent most of my non-sleeping non-working time going through the book and taking notes- I mentally gave myself about a week to go through the entire book. I photocopied maps to study (and later, to Sharpie out the information on them so I can see if I can remember what goes where), I filled up an entire set of index cards ("Old World") and started a second set ("New World) with regions/wines/grapes used/etc, I have each chapter outlined in my handy dandy notebook (in my almost illegible handwriting), and I ran a completely new pen out of ink in the process and started on a second pen. I still have maybe four very short chapters on spirits and such to go (only about ten more pages, total), but I am breathing much more easily now. Well, until I think about having to actually remember all this stuff. At least now I have notes, will travel, and I can lug them around with me and stare at them while commuting over the next few weeks. Trying to write on Caltrain sucks, to say the least.
So my lot in life is such that I won't remember the main villages in the Grande Champagne region of Cognac, but I will remember stupid random things that will never get asked on the exam. I don't know why I find some of this stuff so amusing or memorable, but I do.
So I present to you a list of random and useless facts and observations about the material presented for the WSET Advanced Degree in Wines and Spirits:
- Germans have the highest per capita consumption of sparkling wine (okay, it is Sekt and not really the finest sparkling wine, but whatever) in the world. Who knew? You would think they would be drinking beer.
- Bulgarian native grapes (Melnik, Gamza, Pamid) all sound like alien names in a bad movie, or pharmaceutical brand names. Pamid particularly sounds like it should be a form of birth control, and Gamza would be for digestive issues. Melnik? Hair loss, I think.
- All Champagne corks must have the word Champagne printed on the part that goes in the bottle, even though Champagne is the only AC in France that doesn't have to actually say AC on the label. All DO Cava corks must have a four-pointed star on them.
- The American market is driven by fashion. Right now, Rhône grapes and Merlot are fashionable. (This is according to the UK authors, and the book was published in 2004. I am pretty sure the version coming out this year has Merlot scratched out and Pinot Noir in its place).
- When the French owned North Africa, North Africa produced 3/4 of the total wine produced in the world. Now, not too much going on there.
- The Margaret River area in Western Australia has few problems with fungus or rot, but has a big bird problem in that the region houses a lot of very bad and hungry birds that eat all the grapes if they can.
- There are so many styles of Port (white, ruby, reserve ruby, tawny, reserve tawny, tawny port with age stated, crusted, late bottled vintage, colheita, vintage, single quinta vintage) that it's just stupid.
- Blaufränkisch is pronounced just as awkwardly as you might think. If you are American, you can call it Limberger/Lemberger, though. Or you can call it Kékfrankos if you are Hungarian, which you are (probably) not.
- Bulgaria used to be a really big deal around ten years ago (especially for Cabernet Sauvignon), and by 1996 Bulgaria was the second-largest wine exporting country in the world.
- Chile probably has the best conditions for grape growing in the world. Supposedly near-perfect. No pests, perfect weather.
See? If I got tested on stupid things, I would be set. In any case, I hope to get a lot more studying and a some more wine tasting done before July 9, because I keep forgetting I really do need to taste stuff, too. And I am definitely not thinking about the fact that my parents roll into town on June 30 and leave on the morning of July 9. Luckily they will have a convention and trip to Napa/Sonoma to distract them from me, because I will surely be muttering random facts to myself by then. I woke up the other morning thinking about the geological difference between Chablis and Petit Chablis (mostly limestone and Kimmeridgian clay for the former, and limestone and the the not-as-good Portlandian clay for the latter), and that is kind of worrisome. When you wake up and "Kimmeridgian clay" is running through your head, you know you are in trouble.

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